Is being happy a trap?
In the book “The Happiness Trap” the author Russ Harris tells the reader that the more we try to find happiness, the more we suffer. A pretty bold statement in a self-help book, but it catches your attention, doesn't it?! The crazy part? – I agree with him!!!
In the book “The Happiness Trap” the author Russ Harris tells the reader that the more we try to find happiness, the more we suffer. A pretty bold statement in a self-help book, but it catches your attention, doesn't it?! The crazy part? – I agree with him!!!
Let’s look at what I mean:
Today there are more and more tips and tricks out there than we can absorb over a lifetime about how to look better, feel better, and ultimately be better. A constant struggle to become better than who we were yesterday. And I dare to claim that it is a human right to have this desire, to always try to improve and better ourselves. What makes it difficult is not only the multiple and contradicting advice available out there but also the constant reminders that we are being compared to predefined standards, chosen by society. – And we are reminded of these comparisons daily. Magazines, social media, TV, radio, podcast, blogs. There is always someone younger, smarter, sexier, prettier, taller, skinnier, wealthier, more successful… then you, me, us.
Today there are more and more tips and tricks out there than we can absorb over a lifetime about how to look better, feel better, and ultimately be better. A constant struggle to become better than who we were yesterday. And I dare to claim that it is a human right to have this desire, to always try to improve and better ourselves. What makes it difficult is not only the multiple and contradicting advice available out there but also the constant reminders that we are being compared to predefined standards, chosen by society. – And we are reminded of these comparisons daily. Magazines, social media, TV, radio, podcast, blogs. There is always someone younger, smarter, sexier, prettier, taller, skinnier, wealthier, more successful… then you, me, us.
So, to be happy, we think we have to be, smarter, sexier, skinnier, wealthier, and more successful… than the person next to us, and we put effort into it. We take one advice one day and another the next and confuse ourselves with it instead, and typically we fail. We fail to the standards and more importantly to the image we have in our minds. We tell ourselves “I would be more happy if…” and you fill in the blank. But this effort into “being happy” is empty. It is filled with false promises and hope. Not because it can’t be achieved but because we somewhere inside of us believe that we are not allowed to be happy until we have whatever we dream about. But happiness isn't a feeling that is given to us just like that. Not long lasting happiness at least. Life happiness doesn't come with a new car, a more fit body, or a larger income. It is not a package deal. Happiness is a stand-alone feeling that can be felt under any circumstances – if you allow yourself to feel it. It is a choice. Your choice, not influenced by social norms and standards, but by your desire to be…
The course | Learn to Love Yourself and Live a Life of Happiness | is to teach you how to be happy in all circumstances so that being happy is who you are and not a goal. Because, by being happy life automatically rewards you with happiness – it is the default setting the Universe works around. It gives you more of what you are. So, instead of striving for something to become happy, let’s be happy and strive for life. Together. Right here.
Xo Helena
